Yes, it's a double bill today. I was gonna write them separately, but the second one's real short so fuck it, you can have a double bill. Aren't I good to you?
First up: I've come up with a new party game. It's called "Considering King Kong". Basically what you do is, put yourself in the mind of King Kong at some point in his life, imagine what he was thinking and discuss your thoughts with others. For example, if you were to consider King Kong when he was at the top of the Empire State Building swatting away those pesky aeroplanes, you may well think that he might have been having some sort of existential crisis:
"What am I doing here? Who am I in this strange and unfamiliar place? Does the fact that I am questioning myself now mean that I have changed somehow? Am I going to get out of this situation alive? But what is life anyway, and what happens when you die? Isn't it funny how when you dream about your own death, you always wake up just as you die. Maybe life itself is a dream, and we do not die, we simply wake up into another life."
Now, I know what yer all thinking. "Axl, that's ridiculous. What kind of points system is in place? For a game, there seems to be no way of clearly indicating a winner." I was hoping to iron out this and other issues with initial testing, but the tests have not gone well. In fact, I can't even get people to play it with me. I think the main reason is that if you say to someone at a party or in the pub "Hey, do you fancy "Considering King Kong"?" they get the wrong idea and thing yer an arrogant pervert.
I will work on this though. I am sure that this is a good idea.
Second up: It snowed in Oxford today which was pretty exciting. However, it also snowed pretty much everywhere else in the UK, and considering how much snow everywhere else got, I feel like I've been somewhat cheated. Why couldn't we have had the snow that London got? Those ungrateful fucks have just been complaining about it all day. "Ooooh, it won't do. Why should our precious little lives have to be interrupted by this cold whiteness? It's not fair." Fuck you London. I would have happily had Oxford take that snow on top of ours. That would've been awesome.
I was gonna give you a bonus third topic, but I've forgotten what it was now.
I might be reading out some of my stuff tomorrow at my College's open mic night. I might wuss out tho. I've never read any of my own stuff on a stage before. It's a pretty scary idea.