Wednesday, 26 August 2009


This is probably going to be another banal and pointless post, but I'm just trying to make sure I write something, anything fairly often.
See, I get lazy, which leads to unproductivity which leads to lack of inspiration which leads to more laziness which leads to more unproductivity etc etc and sooooooo on.
Today at least twice I thought of great things to write about on here, but forgot them as soon as it came to write them.
The 300 project is going very badly and I'm considering aborting it altogether, but part of me isn't ready to give up totally on it just yet, even tho there are still 275 to write and I know deep down there is no way I am ever actually going to do it.

Last night me & Sweet G went to our mate Chloe's parents house which is big, beautiful and in Burford. Messers Lewis & Lewis and Madam Simpson were there also. We made pizza and played Trivial Pursuit. And drank booze of course. It was pretty awesome times.

I bought the new Brendon Burns stand-up dvd "Sober Not Clean" today, and it's fucking funny.
Almost as funny as "In The Loop" which I also bought. That film is so damn good.

Oxford now has a 'Hotel Chocolat' on it's high street, which means I am in danger of either a) gorging on expensive but amazing chocolate until I explode, or b) going bankrupt in an attempt to achieve a).

Today I have watched this about 10 times at least. It's insane and amazing and mental and awesome and totally bizarre and quite possibly absolute bloody genius.

Okay, look I know my blog is getting pretty dull, but I'm really trying to get into the habit of writing again. This will get good again, I promise. Just bear with me for a while, okay?


Well then you can just shove a load of origami flowers up yer jacksie as far as I'm concerned.

Tuesday, 25 August 2009

Another Day...

Today I speculated on what my penis would look like if I laminated it with a laminater. I concluded that it would look like a packet of Parma Ham.
Last night I dreamed that I was at a festival and got chatting to one of the organisers who took me back to his place and showed me his collection of guitars. He asked me to photograph them and take them to The Vatican to show the Pope. While I was there he wanted me to photograph The Vatican's guitar collection to bring back and show him. All the time he was asking me about all this, I was trying to take a photo of a lamp he had in the room we were in, but I kept getting it wrong.
Not much else to report. I watched the 'Bourne' trilogy over the last three days, I fucking love those films, and still haven't started the next book I'm supposed to read. I might do that in a bit.
Sweet Lady G wrote a very moving blog today:
I was going to start drawing pictures and posting those as blog entries, but I just looked at Lex's blog and that's exactly what he's started doing, and I don't know if I can compete with these gems:
And SHOCK!! HORROR!! I actually bothered to look at Cakeyvoice today, having given up on it assuming that Hannah would never post anything ever again, and she bloody has! And it's got a link to a mini-feature on her knitted glories that was published by Total Film. Go look, it's ace:

You know what a great word is that no-one uses anymore? Jacksie. Jacksie is a bloody great word and I'm gonna try and bring it back, and if you don't like it, then you can shove it up yer jacksie!

Dreams Cont.

This sudden phase of being able to remember my dreams is a bit of a double-edged sword.
On the one hand I remember such bizarre gems as the dream I had the other night about people selling their legs to make money and so loads of people had one false leg. Only one though, there was some law against people selling both their legs. There were people going round drugging people and taking their legs from them to make money on the black market. Y'know, like you used to hear about people doing with kidneys. What happened to that by the way? Did other people's kidneys suddenly stop being profitable or something?
On the other hand though it means I remember dreams like the one I had last night that was so horrific and upsetting that I don't even like thinking about it, let alone want to write about it on here. It's making me not want to go to sleep.

Friday, 21 August 2009

I Just Realised Something.

This post was total bollocks, so I've deleted it.

Thursday, 20 August 2009


I've been remembering my dreams recently. This very rarely happens for me, but the last three nights in a row I have been able to clearly remember what I dreamed about. I wonder why this is?
I can only remember one of them off the top of my head now. What happened was, I was at work and I fainted. Craig was massively unsympathetic about it complaining that I hadn't done anything all day anyway, and that he thought I was faking it.
Next bit involves me waking up in a room, being attended to by a nurse. Nurse left the room. So did I. I found that I was in a hotel by a beach. I went out onto the terrace where Katherine & Bevan were sitting in the sun. I suddenly really needed the loo, but for some reason the bathroom was out of order or busy or I couldn't get to it or something, so I ended up weeing into a glass (or it may have been a bottle), and Bevan got offended that I wouldn't let her watch me piss.
I then started to drink my own urine that I'd just passed, but stopped because it tasted extremely bitter, like a really bitter lemon drink, and so I tipped the rest of it onto the beach. At which point suddenly my Grandpa was with K & B, and got really annoyed at me for tipping it away, saying it was a waste and that I should've finished it.
And that was my dream.
Piss seems to be a recurring theme in my dreams. Well, the ones I remember anyway. I still remember the dream I had where I was in my mates Jef & PC's house when they lived on Abingdon Road, and I was in Jef's bedroom, and basically the dream was that someone was in their bathroom and so I started to have a piss on Jef's bedroom floor, and it wouldn't stop, and the longer it went on for the more powerful it got, to the stage where it was gushing out as if my cock were a fireman's hose, piss going all over the place.
Luckily, I haven't woken from any of these dreams having wet the bed, which is always the worry.
I just looked on, and it says the following:

To see urine in your dream, represents the feelings you have rejected.

To dream that you are urinating, symbolizes a cleansing and release of negative or repressed emotions. Depending on your dream context, urination is symbolic of having or lacking basic control of your life.

To dream that you are urinating in public, symbolizes a lack of privacy in your affairs or your need to make a public apology or confession.

Hmmmmmmm..... So basically I'm a messed up little puppy.
Oh dear.

To lighten the mood, here are some other things that has to say:

Oral Sex
To dream that you are giving or receiving oral sex, signifies your willingness to give or receive pleasure/joy.� It is symbolic of your creative energy and reaffirms that you are headed in the right direction in life.� The dream may also be a pun on talking about sex. You may need to communicate with your mate about your sexual needs and desires. Perhaps you are acting out your sexual wishes.

To see a giraffe in your dream, suggests that you need to consider the overall picture. Take a broader view on your life and where it is headed.

To see Jesus in your dream, foretells that your greatest desires and goals will be realized. This dream serves to console and strengthen you in your times of adversity, hardship and struggle. You will rise above any situation and circumstance and become victorious.

To dream that Jesus speaks to you or that you are praying with Him, signifies that you will be blessed with true peace of mind, joy and contentment.

Hmmmm... I was starting to think this website was made by some christian group, but when I looked up "God", the second thing that came up was:

To see Godzilla in your dream, signifies feelings of being out of control and that your situation is getting the best of you.

Tee hee hee!
Now, I wonder what a dream where I'm pissing on a giraffe while Godzilla gives it oral sex would mean? I don't know, but that sounds like a pretty awesome dream to me.

Friday, 14 August 2009

Things Today That Have Made Me Feel Less Like A Writer And More Like A Failiure.

1. Reading Angela Carter.
2. Watching 30 Rock.
3. Reading Pet Moon. ( )
5. Reading the feedback comments from my tutors about my work last term.
6. Once again not being able to write anything for '300 x 300'.

Things that will make me feel better: Going round Sweet G's later for Risotto and getting cuddles on the sofa while we watch a dvd. Mmmmmmmmmmmm.....

Thursday, 13 August 2009

Wednesday, 12 August 2009


Here are a couple of amazing videos:
This is some "Sand Animation" by someone for the Ukraine. It is incredible.

And here is the latest trailer for the film "Where The Wild Things Are", which I am unbelievably excited about:

Albums that have recently rocked the Potato Farm world:
Mos Def - 'The Ecstatic'
MSTRKRFT - 'Fist Of God'
Jónsi & Alex - 'Riceboy Sleeps'
Led Bib - 'Sensible Shoes'
Shit & Sine - '229-2299 Girls Against Shit'
Planetary Assault Systems - 'Temporary Suspension'

Right. That's it for now.