Thursday, 27 May 2010

An Anonymous Diana Vickers Fan Speaks Out!

Check this out! It's a comment that was left on my Diana Vickers post I did the other day:

Anonymous said...

Are you really THAT stupid?? The song is about killing LOVE, .. NOT, I Repeat, NOT about killing as in dead.

Furthermore,.. do your frigging homework, .. It is documented virtually everywhere, that the song was written by Cathy Dennis and Eg White. If you don't know 'this', and not prepared to find out, but are fully prepared to malign someone, you really shouldn't be posting this crap.

26 May 2010 06:19:00 GMT+01:00

I felt I should reply to this person and their comment, so this is that reply:

Wow. SO much to work with here. Let's go.


Of course I know it's about love, in the same way that Cheryl Cole's 'Parachute' is about love along with about a ton of other shitty little songs. What I'm doing is removing the metaphorical aspect to highlight the poorly conceived and dreadfully written trash that passes for so many song lyrics. I could write a song that said something like: 'When you're caving in, I'll be your steel girder, I'll support your weight.' Now, that is a poignant statement about how when the one that I love has so much going on emotionally that they feel they can't cope with it all, I will be there to help support them in their time of need. However, you may have noticed that it is a statement told as a really fucking terrible metaphor. Just because something that is written is written about love, doesn't make it good, especially if when taken literally it is a fucking stupid statement to make, like 'I'm only gonna let you kill me once' is. (I would also pick apart the Cheryl Cole's 'Parachute' lyrics now, but presumably you will have done your frigging homework and found that I already wrote a blog post about that.)

Secondly,.. what,.. the Hell, .. is all,.. 'this', .. about?? Do you, .. like,.. understand punctuation, .. and what the point of it is,.. at all??

Thirdly, you say it is documented 'virtually everywhere' that Cathy Dennis and Eg White wrote the song. Really? I think you're wrong about this. I had a look in the glove compartment of my girlfriend's car and there was nothing about it in there. I received a bank statement the other day and there was no mention of songwriters in among the details of the money coming into and going out of my account. I read the play 'Translations' by Brian Friel recently and didn't find one mention of Cathy Dennis or Eg White in this interesting portrayal of 19th Century Ireland during the time that the English were recording and rendering into English all the traditional Gaelic place names. There was no reference to it in the 'Lost' season finale, or in fact in any of the episodes leading up to it for that matter. I haven't seen anything about it on the news. There was nothing stating this fact on the wrapper of the 'Snickers' bar I ate yesterday. Have I sufficiently made my point yet?

Now piss off and never darken my blogspot again, you simpleton.


Jamie said...

If someone's such a diehard Diana Vickers fan, why did they feel so ashamed of their opinion they became "Anonymous" anyway?

Mr Axl said...

HA! Good question dude.

Pipsywoo said...

You've just made me wee myself a little bit, only a little bit mind you. I'm not ancient and lacking controls of my bladder just yet!
If only there had been a mention about Cathy Dennis in Gen's glovebox, if only!!!